For years, researchers have been talking about the Happiness Curve. The theory held that happiness drops off in your mid to late 20s, plummeting till 47, before climbing back to shiny, young standards. It explained the concept of the mid-life crisis, and explained why by the time we're grey, we’re enjoying ourselves again.

They figured out that by your mid-40s, you're asking yourself a lot of tough questions: did I choose my path, or take the path of least resistance? What if I had done X, Y, and Z? What if I hadn't done X, Y, and Z? Is it too late to change? Is it worth the trade? By that age, they postulated, we’ve seen our peers differentiate themselves. Some of them became successful people we wish we were, others destroyed their lives, and we can barely grasp that we all came from the same place. We compare (comparison being the thief of joy) our houses or lack thereof, our marriages or lack thereof, and our genius or punk ass kids to their genius or punk ass kids. Plus, by your mid 40s, you find yourself still trying to barely hold it all together while being aware that we thought it would be different by now -- that we would be different by now. That something should've changed.

The theory is that happiness rebounds right before, or just about, 50 years old. Somehow our maturity overrides our panic and self judgement, and we get back on board with joy. Maybe we do make some of those changes, or maybe we decide this was the right path all along. Either way, we chill out, get happier, and stay that way. This is why you often see a woman with long grey hair and no face fillers laughing easily. Or a man in suspenders and a fading hairline having more fun than gym rats in sports cars. Both of them walk into rooms with more confidence and fewer fucks to give than the 10s who don't feel like 10s, and spend their every waking moment striving to be perceived as 10s. The 10s hate this, by the way. It confuses them, and they think it's delusional, but they haven't been through the fire yet. The fire is transformational.

This is good news for me on the brink of my 47th birthday. It means that my miserable years are coming to a close; which is wild, because I'm not miserable. I mean, I'm a lot of things, and miserable sometimes, but if these were my dark years, hallelujah.

It's bad news for the youngsters, because it turns out that the U shape of happiness is flattening. The carefree happiness of youth has all but disappeared, and people aged 18-29 are now the least happy age group. What changed? Well, financial prospects no longer look as promising as they once did. The job you get in your 20s will no longer let you get a leg up on your future goals, and probably won't even let you get a cute little spot of your own in which to practice being an adult. We know the kids are going out less (which is wild), drinking less (which is good), and having less sex than ever (which is unconscionable).

Our online lives have distanced us from real connections. Your 20s are supposed to be for seeing your friends every day (and believing it will always be that way). It's the decade of 2-for-1 pizza, late nights, exploring all the different parts of the city, and society as a whole, finding where you fit and where you don't. Now people eschew phone calls as too intimate while wondering why they're lonely. There won't be candid photos to look back on because everything is a highly curated moment, a forced façade instead of a real glimpse into existence. Everything is about the likes and interactions you receive from people who are also carefully constructing an online presence while not being present in their own lives.

The urge to compare sets in earlier: followers, fame, luxury -- we perpetually see the apparently easy, admirable lives of others starting from a young age. It's enough to make even the most logical and grounded 20-something wonder why not me? Why should I grind, and save, and struggle while influencers get to feed parrots in a jungle on a weekend getaway? They never get the chance to learn how extensive the illusion is, or how rewarding the long game can be. They're soured on it before it even starts.

I guess this is a time divide that worked in my favor. Having skipped MySpace, my top 5 friends knew who they were because I saw them every day. I was nearly 30 when I finally got Facebook, and comparison still wasn't my bag; it was nice to see where my wandering peers had gone off to, and who had married whom. I believe there was a small intervention to get me to finally join Instagram, but I knew by then that in the event that I do get famous, it won't be for my thirst traps.

It's not too late (I don't think) for individuals to pull themselves out of the sad curve. Sure, the generation itself is probably screwed (the happiness stats have never looked so dismal), but there's no reason You have to fall into that majority. Make a point of comparing less and connecting more. Remember that being rich and miserable is worse than being poor and happy. And maybe, just maybe, better days are right over the horizon.

READ LOCAL, GIFT LOCAL

Tara McGowan-Ross is a cool chick with the nerve to live her life on hard and write the nitty gritty truth about it. Her prose is candid, self-aware, and unflinching. Plus, she's a real live person I know, and that means I have writer friends, which adds to my caché, and validates me as a writer. You can buy her book at Drawn & Quarterly and Indigo.

Jessica Bebenek is a multidisciplinary artist who does super cool things with textiles and words, sometimes together. Her new poetry book No One Knows Is Here is out now, and it's perfect for cozy inside days, sipping tea, and watching it snow. She's super fab as a person, and I love that these poems are dark, honest, and beautiful. It's the delicious melancholy we need to balance the fucking silver bells and bright lights. Proud to call such a talented and cool lady my friend. Buy her book from Hugo Press.

Dawn Mcsweeney is, well, it's me, so it's hard to say complimentary things here, but before I wrote essays, I wrote fiction and poetry. My novel, The Mountains We Climb By Accident is less coming-of-age, and more coming-to-self; love, loss, and mental illness don't check IDs. The imagery is vivid, the prose is chef’s kiss, and the feedback I've received has touched me deeply. If you like my essays, go see what my imagination can do. Get it on Amazon.

SNAP SOME SEASONAL SELFIES

Get your fas la-la-la-ing with a Christmas market! Local and regional artisans have their wares for sale, mulled wine and seasonal delicacies are ready to enjoy, and the music will be decidedly seasonal. Whether you're looking to shop, browse, or just take a stroll through a Hallmark moment, this is the spot.

WHAT: Montreal Christmas Market

WHERE: Quartier des Spectacles

WHEN: On now through January 4, from 11 AM to 10 PM

METRO: Place-des-Arts (Green)

DETAILS: NoelMontreal

ANTI-BOURGEOIS BURLESQUE

Charles Dickens’ classic holliday tale gets a modern spin. Will the miserly Scrooge change his ways, stop raising rents, closing down cool venues, and quit it with the noise complaints? Only the power of art and burlesque can change his cold, boring heart.

A burlesque extravaganza with Classy Clare, Whisky Dame, Tahatie, Miss Pretty Pretentious, Jimmy Phule, and more!

WHAT: Not Your Usual Rodeo presents A Christmas Carol

WHERE: The Wiggle Room, 3874 Boul. St. Laurent Blvd., Montreal, H2W 1Y2

WHEN: Thursday, December 11, Doors @ 730 PM, Show @ 8 PM

METRO: Sherbrooke (Orange)

TICKETS: WiggleRoom

SLEAZY’S SELLING FAST! HUSTLE UP!

Montreal’s art scene would be nothing without the loft ecosystem that’s supported the most ground level and underground art this city has seen. From artist’s live-in studios to rehearsal spaces to DIY venues, Montreal’s collection of loft spaces has supported the artistic community for decades. Sure, the city’s current political situation, from the war on nightlife to the affordable housing problem, has changed the landscape of Loft Life, but it’s not dead. Not yet.

The Halbro Building, aka 10 Pine West, is a testament to this resilience. Originally a textile factory, the building was converted to lofts in the 1980’s. Since then, the building has served as the home for individual artists, circus collectives, dance studios, underground venues, art galleries, yoga studios, even the headquarters for the Raeliens. Yes, the Raeliens.

Multidisciplinary artist Andrew Jamieson’s personal history is deeply rooted in 10 Pine West. Not only a previous resident, he has produced numerous events in the building, including his first immersive theatre production Lethal and Young, which premiered in 2016. The unit where the experience was produced is now known as LittleLoft, shepherded by Mike Hand. Jamieson then moved to another loft, just around the corner, at 3655 Saint Laurent, where he established 303LAB, a creative space and DIY venue. Here he developed the immersive theatre production Andrew Jamieson’s Who’s Afraid.

Jamieson’s work, from multidisciplinary events, venues, and performances to immersive theatre, has been described as “loft-based transgressivism”. It is with this spirit that you are invited to Andrew Jamieson’s Sleazy Christmas IV: The Immaculate Reception. Whether you remember, and yearn for the days of MTL loft parties, or you missed the ephemera entirely and long for that experience, this event is for you. In its fourth year, Sleazy Christmas has become both a seasonal tradition, and an important event for local arts magazine Forget The Box.

Forget The Box is Montreal’s most in-depth online arts magazine, covering ground level, underground, and marginalized art. FTB is the city’s only devoted Anglo arts publication, addressing the expansive void of coverage, providing MTL with vital arts journalism. This ambitious non-profit project is led by Jamieson himself, with an accomplished team featuring Candice Ann as Editor-in-Chief, Dawn McSweeney as Editor-at-Large, fundraisers Max Paster and Matthew Retino, Social Media Manager Shireen Aamir, and Treasurer Ashlan Phoenix Grey, and involves ever-growing pool of talented contributors.

All proceeds from The Immaculate Reception directly benefit Forget The Box, supporting its mission to cover and champion art in Montreal. As a fledgling not-for-profit organization, the Sleazy Christmas fundraiser is currently the single most important yearly event for the magazine. Your attendance and contributions ensure the continuation of Montreal’s newest arts institution, giving a permanent platform to the voices and artists who operate outside of the mainstream. Your support is a direct investment in the resilience and future of Montreal's arts community.

Join Andrew Jamieson, Dawn McSweeney (comedy), Tara McGowan-Ross (spoken word), Mina Minou (burlesque), and the FTB team in celebration of the holiday season and Montreal’s art scene. Sleazy Christmas is a true MTL holiday loft party, featuring legendary local artists and performers, a silent auction, and a 50/50 cash raffle. And most importantly: It's BYOB.

10$ Donation to Forget The Box

This is a mixer event, please feel free to arrive at your leisure, as performances will occur throughout the night.

WHAT: Andrew Jamieson’s Sleazy Christmas IV: The Immaculate Reception

WHERE: The Halbro Building, 10 Pine W., #415, Montreal, H2W 1P9

WHEN: Saturday, December 13, Doors @ 7 PM

METRO: Sherbrooke (Orange)

TICKETS: Showpass

“NERD ART” CRACKED ME UP. ACCURATE, THO.

If you want to buy anime/nerd art or you are an artist yourself, come visit Cafe Eevee as some of Montreal's best sell the best nerd art in Montreal.

WHAT: Café Eevee Anime Art Sale

WHERE: Café Eevee, 1251 St. Zotique St. E., Montreal, H2S 1N8

WHEN: Saturday, December 13 & Sunday, December 14, from 8 AM to 6 PM

METRO: Beaubien (Orange)

DETAILS: Facebook

RAISING FUN & FUNDS

In 2022, Kristin Govers debuted The Awkward Ballerina, a true story about living with cerebral palsy (CP) and a dream of ballet. It has since been performed over 20 times across North America, including at the Montreal Fringe Festival (where it was nominated for Best English Production and Most Promising Emerging Artist), the Windsor Fringe Festival, and internationally at the Winter Mini Fest in Orlando, Florida.

Pregnant... And It’s Still Awkward! is the follow-up to Kristin’s award-nominated first solo show, exploring her pregnancy journey, and the unique experience of being pregnant while living with CP. With a blend of humour, heart, and honesty, the show shares the realities of morning sickness, unpredictable hormones, and navigating pregnancy in a non-cooperative body. Ultimately, it celebrates resilience, motherhood, and the vital power of laughter in the face of adversity. Kristin’s ultimate goal is to raise awareness about life with a disability and, most importantly, to show her son that dreams are never impossible.

"Hormones & Humour & Humanity" is a cocktail party and performance event, assisting Kristin and her company Two Left Feet Productions to raise the crucial funds for the exciting new adventure of self-production, staging her newest play, Pregnant... And It’s Still Awkward!

Hosted by Andrew Jamieson, performances by Le Rockonteur, PostitPaul, Dawn McSweeney, and more, will be scattered throughout the night. Headlining the event will be Kristin Govers, presenting a highly anticipated preview of Pregnant... And It’s Still Awkward! The evening promises entertainment, connection, and purpose.

As well, a CASH raffle will take place, featuring gifts generously donated by local merchants and artisans in support of Kristin’s production.

$15 Online

$20 Door

WHAT: Hormones & Humour & Humanity

WHERE: Aux Angles Rond, 5333 St. Laurent Blvd., Montreal, H2T 1S5

WHEN: Friday, December 19 @ 7 PM

METRO: Laurier (Orange)

TICKETS: ShowPass

JOKES OUT WEST

It's the United Comedy Crew’s Christmas Wisecracking Gala!

I'm hyped to be hosting this one! Featuring Andrew Searles, Franco Taddeo, and UCC founder Richard Mullan. These dudes have killer credits, and as always, I'm just happy to be here. Call your Wasteland friends, and tell them it's a date. Organize a carpool, or hitch a ride. (Ubers should be cheap, ‘cuz it's a Monday). It'll be worth it!

WHAT: UCC’s Christmas Wisecracking Gala

WHERE: Duffy’s Dorval, 1060 Herron Rd., Dorval, H9S 1B3

WHEN: Monday, December 22 @ 830 PM

METRO: Nope.

DETAILS: Facebook

World’s Smallest Comedy Night has so many cool things happening, so here are their events this week in order!

What Do You Know? Like, Seriously…

Tonight! Come to Hurley's for Trivia Night, and get bonus laughter! Enjoy delicious pub fare, and get ready to show off your trivia skills. Grab your team, and enjoy this night of comedy, friendly competition, and great company!

This edition is hosted by Vance Michel, featuring James Mancini, Erik Intrevado, and Miguel McKenna!

WHAT: Trivia Night at Hurley's

WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1

WHEN: Every Wednesday @ 8 PM

METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)

DETAILS: Facebook

Classic Coke

Beat the Monday Blues with WSC’s OG offering, The World's Smallest Comedy Night!

Enjoy a showcase of the best comedians in the city, hot up-and-comers, national and international touring comics, and surprises!

Hosted by Vance Michel, featuring James Mancini, Dominic Allan, Eric Spicely, George Assily, Sarah Warren, Miguel McKenna, Peter Bowen, and Ceecee Huys!

WHAT: The World's Smallest Comedy Night

WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1

WHEN: Every Monday, Doors @ 7 PM, Show @ 8 PM

METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)

TICKETS: Eventbrite

Dirty Monday

The Monday Night Dirty Mic is the place to be! Hosted by Vance Michel, every show is an unpredictable and unique experience as a hilarious collection of comedians from newbs to pros take the stage. See the best before anyone else, and catch seasoned locals doing their freshest funnies!

Comics: show-up, sign-up

WHAT: Monday Night Dirty Mic

WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1

WHEN: Every Monday, Sign-up @ 10 PM, Show @ 1030 PM

METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)

DETAILS: Facebook