McSweeney’s List (18 February 2026)
THREADS OF LOVE
After a lovely ramen dinner, my dear friend and I stepped into the frigid night. We clutched our fresh teas, trying to channel the heat from the cup into our bones. The festive light decor along St. Catherine's kept us oohing and ahhing even as we struggled to stay upright on the sketchy sidewalk ice.
“Thanks for making time for me today,” she said.
“Of course!” I replied, because we know that our time together uplifts both of us.
“You'd be surprised,” she continued, “how many people get a relationship or build a family, and just…you never see them again.”
When we met, I was in a long-term relationship, and she was (still is) happily married. She was there as my relationship stagnated, as I tried to tell myself it was fine. She moved away for a bit, and when she returned my relationship was over. Insert a couple of false starts and some random attempts, and by the time I started my current relationship, she was there to cheer me on.
But it's true that looking back, I see plenty of examples of how right she is about the disappearance of friends when they partner up or expand their families.
My high school friendships fell away soon after I dropped out of CEGEP; I was already engaged, had moved to a different part of town, but was trying to maintain my relationships. When I got pregnant though, the old friends fell away. Sure, I had less time, but mostly, I was in a whole different world. I remember what might've been the last call from a friend when she invited me to a party that night, and while I don't remember if I was still pregnant or already a mom, I clearly recall trying to explain to her that I just couldn't. The divide between 18 year olds who are embarking on newfound freedom and a teen mom are vast. While it made me sad at the time, the fact that my entire social life switched up around that time made total sense.
In adulthood, it still happens, but for different, usually unspoken reasons. We’ve all had that friend that partnered up and vanished. No more hangs, they ghost the group chat, and you never run into them at the old haunts again. We’ve also probably been that friend from time to time. And to be fair, I don't think it's a conscious decision. I think that when we find a source of sweetness, we gorge ourselves, and forget everything else. Or we sub-consciously know that our relationship cannot withstand the light of external witnesses: that there's a flaw, a lack of continuity. Either we know our friends won't mesh with our partners, or we know that we are showing a side of ourselves that our friends wouldn't recognize.
What I said, walking in the cold night filled with warm vibes was this:
“It makes sense if you're just having a fling; you want to hunker down and enjoy the limited time, even if we won't say that part out loud. But I'm building a life, and all the people I love have to be in it.”
My boyfriend and I are not new in the box. We can't even argue gentle wear; we have been through the wash, we have loved hard, rained tears, and we have made promises in our lives that didn't work out how we hoped. That's perhaps the bonus of mid life relationships: we've seen shit, felt a whole rainbow of emotions, and have no space left for illusion. We talk about our feelings, our thoughts, our plans for the future. That makes it much easier than the half relationships where you cancel your plans last minute because they finally called. It's also easier than the relationships where no one speaks of the future for fear of breaking the spell; you know, the spell where you both know this isn't for the long haul, but you simply leave it unsaid to preserve what's left.
Am I prioritizing my time differently and thus have less to spread around? Yes; and making play dates with adults is tricky as it is, so I definitely see people less. Friendships become a choice and not a convenience. I am consciously and consistently choosing these people with a new awareness and appreciation. That means I'm glad to make time -- I get to make time -- with the people that I love. The life I want is a tapestry built of the threads that matter most to me.
And that begs the question: what threads are you integrating into your life? Who are the people you want to grow with, and how are you feeding those relationships? What are you clinging to in your life that you know can't withstand the gaze of an honest witness? These are important questions, Dear Reader, ones that impact how you proceed, and where you’ll arrive. Family means so much more than who you share your home with; it's the friends who remember where you came from so you can see how far you've come, and the new folks who embark on your journey with you from here, because you're a whole different person now. While it's true that some prefer to keep their personal and romantic lives separate, it's important to ask yourself why. Will your friends pop the bubble of self-delusion? Are you embarrassed of your love, your homies, or how you code switch between the two?
Beyond that, it's important to remember that they're all parts of you. Keeping your eggs in separate baskets in a whole different part of your kitchen makes cooking tricky. They are all ingredients that make your life, and the cake comes out best when you find the right blend.
GO SEE A MOVIE
Why am I telling you to go see a movie? Because it's an independent success story. When YouTuber Mark Fischbach (aka Markiplier) decided to adapt the 2022 video game Iron Lung for the big screen, he went indie with it. He’s the writer, director, leading man, plus he financed the damn thing. It was supposed to be a super limited release: maybe 50 theatres, for one weekend. But then something awesome happened: he asked his fans to petition theatres to show the movie, and things got wild. Now the movie is playing in about 3000 theatres, all because he had the nerve to do it, and fans who believed in him and his project. It's a wonderful reminder for artists that it can be done, and a reminder for art consumers that their fandom can move mountains.
It's playing at Cineplex and CinéStarz.
POST GRIND
We’ve all gotta grind, but getting lost in your inbox, and fake smiling through meetings can really take you away from yourself.
Dr. Lemco’s got a treatment for that.
The After Work Art Party is a fun, low-pressure way to unwind, get creative, and meet cool people in a cozy Montreal art studio. Leave the office behind, and reconnect with the best parts of who you are.
WHAT: The After Work Art Party
WHERE: Dr. Lemco's Creative Club
WHEN: Thursday, February 19
METRO: Vendôme (Orange)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
GROOVY GOODIES
Le Marché Vintage is back!
35+ super cool, vintage loving vendors in one spot, make it a day for one stop shopping!
Browse and shop vintage clothes, jewelry, and all sorts of goodies!
Retro beats will be on deck all day thanks to vinyl DJ Parka Pat!
Come out and treasure hunt!
(There are still some vendor spots available! If you are interested please fill out this Google form.)
WHAT: Le Marché Vintage - Vintage Pop-up Market
WHERE: Église Catholique Saint-Enfant-Jésus, 5039 Rue Saint-Dominique, Montréal, QC H2T 1V1
WHEN: Saturday, February 21, 10 AM - 5 PM
METRO: Laurier (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
HIGH VIBES
Saturday Feb. 21st, 2026 at 7pm, the Sri Chinmoy Centre of Montreal is offering a mini-concert (in a house) of meditative music featuring Pavaka’s Group.
The concert is free, but seating is limited, so reservations are required.
When you reserve your spot, they’ll text you the address (proving meditative music can still bring the underground vibes).
This concert will allow you to experience a meditative environment full of Peace and Joy, featuring the compositions of Sri Chinmoy.
Curious? Check them on YouTube.
WHAT: Free “House” Concert - Music for Meditation
WHERE: Reserve your spot to get the address
WHEN: Saturday, February 21 @ 7 PM
METRO: Snowdon (Orange & Blue)
RSVP: MontrealMeditation
FANCY FLASHBACK
The OJV (L’Orchestre de Jeux Vidéo) invites you to its special GameCube concert!
Relive the magic of this legendary console through unforgettable music: from the intense battles of Super Smash Bros. Melee to the sunny worlds of Super Mario Sunshine, the mysteries of Metroid Prime, and the epic adventures of The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker.
A unique musical journey that will capture the nostalgia and energy of the GameCube era!
WHAT: GameCube Concert
WHERE: Salle Claude-Champagne, 220 Vincent D'Indy Ave., Outremont, H2V 2T5
WHEN: Saturday, February 21 @ 730 PM
METRO: Édouard-Montpetit (Blue)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
World’s Smallest Comedy Night has so many cool things happening, so here are their events this week in order!
What Do You Know? Like, Seriously…
Tonight! Come to Hurley's for Trivia Night, and get bonus laughter! Enjoy delicious pub fare, and get ready to show off your trivia skills. Grab your team, and enjoy this night of comedy, friendly competition, and great company!
This edition is hosted by Vance Michel, featuring Nazeer Khan, and Quinn Lague.
WHAT: Trivia Night at Hurley's
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Every Wednesday @ 8 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
RSVP: Eventbrite
Ladies Night
Beat the Monday Blues with WSC’s The World's Smallest Comedy Night Femme Edition!
Enjoy a showcase of the best female comedians in the city! It’ll be a gaggle of giggles, wonderful night of women, a fantastic evening of femmes! Gather your gals, ‘cuz this is gonna rock!
Hosted by Abby Stonehouse featuring Mbsinne, Carmina Berbari Daou, Heidi Lynn Weeks, Dayna Lieberman, Raquel Maestre, Dawn McSweeney, Shosho Abotouk, and Mariam Khan.
WHAT: The World's Smallest Comedy Night Femmes Edition
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Every Monday, Doors @ 7 PM, Show @ 8 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
RSVP: Eventbrite
Dirty Monday
The Monday Night Dirty Mic is the place to be! Hosted by Vance Michel, every show is an unpredictable and unique experience as a hilarious collection of comedians from newbs to pros take the stage. See the best before anyone else, and catch seasoned locals doing their freshest funnies!
Comics: show-up, sign-up
WHAT: Monday Night Dirty Mic
WHERE: Hurley's Irish Pub, 1225 Crescent St., Montreal, H3G 2B1
WHEN: Every Monday, Sign-up @ 10 PM, Show @ 1030 PM
METRO: Lucien l'Allier (Orange) & Guy-Concordia (Green)
DETAILS: Facebook
